It Snowed Last Night

 

It Snowed Last Night……

 

8:00 am: I made a snowman with my kids

8:10 - A feminist passed by and asked me why I didn't make a snow woman. 

8:15 - So, I made a snow woman. 

8:17 - My feminist neighbor complained about the snow woman's voluptuous chest saying it objectified snow women everywhere. 

8:20 - The gay couple living nearby threw a hissy fit and moaned it could have been two snowmen instead. 

8:22 - The transgender man..women...person asked why I didn't just make one snow person with detachable parts. 

8:25 - The vegans at the end of the lane complained about the carrot nose, as veggies are food and not to decorate snow figures with. 

8:28 - I was being called a racist because the snow couple is white. 8:31 - The middle eastern gent across the road demanded the snow woman be covered up. 

8:40 - The Police arrived saying someone had been offended. 

8:42 - The feminist neighbor complained again that the broomstick of the snow woman needed to be removed because it depicted women in a domestic role. 

8:43 - The town council equality officer arrived and threatened me with eviction. 

8:45 - TV news crew from ABC showed up. I was asked if I know the difference between snowmen and snow-women? I replied "Snowballs" and I have now been labeled a sexist. 

9:00 - I was on the News as a suspected terrorist, racist, homophobe sensibility offender, bent on stirring up trouble during difficult weather. 9:10 - I was asked if I had any accomplices. My children were taken by social services. 

9:29 - Far left protesters offended by everything marched down the street demanding that I be arrested.

 

Moral: There is no moral to this story. It is what we have become, all because of snowflakes

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